Isaiah Zimmerman talks God, sexuality and his journey.

Age: 18

Hobbies: singing, acting, dancing, photography

Favorite actors: Oscar Isaac, Meryl Streep, Sherie Rene Scott

Favorite song: “Honest” by Joseph

Favorite performance art: singing

Ideal job: “Being in a traveling performance group that goes around and brings art to people who don’t get to experience it.”

You went to Portland Christian schools for five years before coming to Grant. Why did you decide to transfer?

At Portland Christian… my (freshman) year I was in a relationship with a guy, and then we broke up because my family found out, and it was a big ordeal. It was hectic. And then the next year, people started to spread rumors about me and that guy, and it was going around and people were finding out. One of the admins called me into their office, and she basically asked, “Are you gay? Do your parents know?” Basically, what she said was “OK, you can be gay; that’s fine. Just don’t show it at school.” And then from there it just kind of escalated, and I just couldn’t be there anymore because it was too
frustrating.

So do you identify as gay?

I don’t know. I go back and forth all the time just because of the people I’m surrounded by. Because I have Grant, who’s like: “Yay, be gay, it’s fine!” and then I have my family. So within myself, I go back and forth all the time. So, short answer: I don’t know, but I’m still figuring it out.

You went to Portland Christian, which is a Christian school. Are you Christian?

I am.

Do you go to church?

I actually don’t go to church very often. Partially, it’s just laziness. On a Sunday morning I don’t want to get up. But it’s also my relationship with God is a lot more intimate and close to my heart, and it’s kind of hard for me to then go to a place where I know at least 90 percent of the people in the building don’t necessarily think what I’m feeling is, you know, good. And a lot of the people in the building think that because I’m having these feelings that I’m this other person. So I guess it’s just about I don’t really feel super comfortable in that environment all the time.

What does Christianity mean to you?

I would say, for me personally, it is hope, and it is love, and it is everything. It is this amalgamation of what the world is or has the potential to be. If I’m going through these horrible things that I have to deal with and these people telling me that I’m disgusting and awful, what’s the point? Like if I didn’t have this point of hope, then I might as well just stop living.

So would you say that you being not straight has given you more faith?

Oh, definitely. It made me have to dig into my own beliefs and have to figure out: What do I really believe? What is Christianity to me? What is God? I mean it made me actually think about that stuff instead of just believing what everyone told me to believe. It’s been a journey, and I am so much closer to God than I have ever been because of it.

You’re a singer, dancer and actor. How long have you been into the arts?

Always. Since I was little. My favorite artist was Gwen Stefani, and then it evolved into Hilary Duff. And then it kind of evolved into like: “Oh, I like singing. Oh, I like being weird or whatever. I like art.” And then in fifth grade, my grandma and grandpa took me to see a musical. It’s called The Spitfire Grill, at Portland Christian actually, which is funny, and I fell in love.

Do you get nervous when you perform?

I wouldn’t say nervous. I get anxious because I’m excited, and it’s the rush of performing. I don’t really get nervous anymore. I mean I’ve done it enough times, and I’m OK with the fact that not everyone is going to like what I’m doing.

You’re also in student leadership.

Yeah,  I love it. With my talent and everything that I do, my number one thing is I always want to find a way to give back with it. That’s why I love leadership and being on the board because it’s just a good outlet. ◊